Europe archives - Page 2 of 3

Alexanderplatz – Berlin

June 29, 2016/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks!

I know you are wondering what Europe will look like after Brexit. Since I am so nice, I will share the intel I have with you. I rented a time machine, travelled in time almost to year 2017 (ie. 2016) and landed on Alexanderplatz. Europe after Brexit seems to look clowdy, slightly futuristic and definitely pompous. Basically the whole of Berlin seemed a bit darker. Some local said to me that winter is coming right after the summer and autumn. He seemed trustworthy, although a bit depressed. He kept mumbling something about Brexit II and the vikings in Iceland, but it was beyond my understanding. Could it mean that the English get to vote to leave United Kingdom or even the island of Great Britain. Maybe England and Iceland will form an union. The future seems to be as interesting as it was last week.

-Gart

Dingwall – Scotland

December 29, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks,

In the Highlands of Scotland you may still hear the echo of Sir William Wallace’s voice: “… they may take our lives, but they’ll never take… our freedom! Or maybe it was Sir Wallace’s squire Mel Gibson who used those inspiring words. It’s difficult to remember all the details precisely after over 700 years. Sir Wallace and Mr. Gibson spent many of their holidays in Dingwall which is even today one of Scotland’s main attractions – plenty to do and a lot to see, if it is not raining. Sir Wallace was appointed as the Guardian of Scotland but later hanged, drawn and quartered. A quarter may have been buried in Dingwall, although very little evidence is available to support this theory.

About two hundred years before the time of Sir Wallace, Macbeth – King of Scotland – was born in Dingwall. Later on a certain historian William Shakespeare made Macbeth famous in his research with a working-title The Tragedy of Macbeth. I understood from Shakespeare’s report the tragedy having been that Macbeth was slain and beheaded. I heard a rumor from some quite trustworthy looking fella in the Mallard, the most prominent tavern of Dingwall, that Macbeth’s head may have also been buried in there.

Dingwall – what a history, what a place!

– Gart

National Art Museum of Catalonia – Barcelona

December 21, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks,

Culture in Catalonia is beyond me. Messi, Neymar, Suárez… In Catalonia the work of the best known contemporary artists may be viewed at Camp Nou, the home stadium of FC Barcelona. Camp Nou is the largest stadium in Spain by capacity, yet it’s too small for the greatnesses performing in it. In addition to football the Catalonians take Roman Catholicism quite seriously. Sagrada Família, a Catholic church in Barcelona, has been under construction since 1882. I heard from some Catalonians that they want to make sure that the Church will be large enough for the greatness that will perform there once the church is completed. Fair enough, I guess it would be dumb to repeat the mistake they made with Camp Nou. Regrettable I didn’t ask who will be the main performed. Some say that Messi is the greatest – could it be he’s signed a contract to appear also in Sagrada Família?

The huge palace in the photo is National Art Museum of Catalonia (abbreviation MNAC). MNAC is dedicated to Catalan art and design from the 19th and 20th centuries. At least the curators of MNAC have plenty of space. MNAC is the perfect spot to hang out they day after FC Barcelona’s game. Here’s an idea: why not sell combo tickets that would allow an entry to Camp Nou and also to MNAC. If the order is double sized, a tour around the construction site of Sagrada Família would be included.

– Gart

St. Peter’s Square – Vatican City State

September 21, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks,

In The Big Lebowski (1998) the Dude himself asked: “Does the Pope sh#t in the woods?” The Dude is a pretty sophisticated guy. After all, there’s a fairly large group of people who follow Dudeism, which has grown from an underground cult to a world religion. But he clearly does not know where the holiness does his business. Or could it be that the Dude says open questions intentionally in order to encourage his followers to find out for themselves. Well, I was a little bit spontaneous and I did travel to the Vatican City State. I did not meet the Pope (he was not home), but I found out this: there are no forests in Vatican City. There’s St. Peter’s Square (photo above), St. Peter’s Basilica (photo below) and some gardens, but no woods! So there’s the answer to the Dude’s question.

While in Vatican, I realized something quite peculiar. Both the Pope and the Dude know this guy called Jesus. Small World, not to mention Vatican City Sate which is super tiny (110 acres, population c. 850, smallest internationally recognized independent state by both area and population). Anyway, Jesus is one of the most quoted men. Thereby, I feel that quoting Jesus Quintana is the only proper way to end this post:

“Nobody f###s with the Jesus!”

– Gart

Stasi museum – Berlin, Germany

August 15, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by kunkku

Hi Folks!

Right after the Second World War things got complicated for the whole world as the Cold War begun. Germany was split into two: east and west. And so begun the short history of East Germany, or formally German Democratic Republic.

East Germany’s ideology was Marxism-Leninism-Satanic with strong scent of communism and other fishy stuff from Soviet Union (I can’t remember where I read this but I’m sure it was a reliable source). In East Germany the ruling power thought that it needed “protection” and established Stasi, a security service which was unique in its own way. Here’s a few complimentary facts for you:

Stasi (Staatssicherheit, State Security), officially The Ministry for State Security (MfS) was the official state security service of German Democratic Republic (GDR) from 1950 to 1990.

Stasi used means out of this world. It had unrestrained access to everywhere and it spied, threatened and tortured people randomly. Stasi employed officially over 90 000 people at its final stages. But we can only guess how many people carried out tasks for Stasi although they were not on the payroll. In East Germany neighbors literally spied each other and reported the peculiarities to Stasi. Just imagine if your neighbor spied on you. I bet it would not take that long until they would spot something to report – especially if your neighbor had been promised a reward.

But the world changes. When the iron curtain collapsed it was the end of history (thank you Mr. Fukuyama for articulating the clever thought). Communism is so last season in Germany. And today Stasi headquarters serves as a museum.

In the picture above you can see Stasi leader, master of the tin foil hats, Erich Mielke’s office untouched. Ok, to be accurate, the office was untouched until my visit. Erich left the building in a hurry and forgot his three smart phones on the desk. Could there be a more obvious invitation to abuse Erich’s Facebook and Twitter accounts.

-Gart

Stasi leader Erich Mielke

Stasi headquarters

Havøygavlen Wind Farm – Norway

July 17, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks!

There’s something quite peculiar in Norway. Norwegians are ancestors of the most brutal Vikings tribes. They’ve settled the most remote places in northern Scandinavia, even fjords and mountains that are unlivable and commonly known to be terrorized by trolls and other nasty, little creatures. Norwegian toddlers are only fed with cod and seal’s eyeballs until they turn five. Arguments in primary school are settled with swords. By the time children reach 16, they are cast out from their families to survive on their own with nothing else with them than the clothing they wear (normally made from wolf fur), a fish hook and a war hammer. I guess rough measures are a necessity in tough environment such as Norway. Norwegians are warlike people, wild by their nature and tough as Mjölnir (JFGI). In fact, I’m quite convinced that Thor himself may have been the first Norwegian.

Although the youth in Norway live in inhumane conditions and one could argue that children’s rights are breached constantly, it gets better for them when they get older. The government of Norway rewards every Norwegian teenager who survives the first 18 years of their lives by providing them with Tesla Model S (full-sized plug-in electric five-door, luxury liftback, produced by Tesla Motors). Some of you could wonder: how could this be, how does the government afford it. Well guess what, affording the cars is not a problem. Due to the high rate of infant and child mortality, not that many children reach the required age of 18. And the populations is only about 5 million. Besides, Norway is one of the world’s ten largest oil and natural gas exporters. Imagine all the dough they are making!!

Energy needs and Havøygavlen Wind Farm

The problem the Norwegians are currently dealing with is to generate electricity enough for all the Teslas cruising up and down the freeways of Norway. Norway is now trying to harness all the electricity sources one could think of. Norway generates nearly 5 percent of the worldwide generated hydropower and they even have solar power plants although the sun rarely shines in Norway. Norway was also the first country to generate electricity commercially using sea-bed tidal power. When the listed energy sources were not enough, dozens of wind farms were built along the coast of Norway. So, because of the government’s Tesla-For-All –policy the world’s most northerly windmill park (Havøygavlen Wind Farm) is located close to a small Norwegian village Havøysund by Barents Sea.

-Gart

Gart at Havøygavlen Wind Farm

Colosseum – Rome

June 30, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks,

This is Colosseum, or more formally the Flavian Amphitheatre. I didn’t know men could build such things. After it was completed in 80 AD, it was included in different versions of the list of Seven Wonders of the Ancient World. The poet Martial (40-102 AD) went even a little bit further. He instructed to lose the whole list of Seven Wonders as, “Rome’s Colosseum is the world’s one and only truly amazing building”.

Some blood has bled on the arena’s dirt, and Maximus, the gladiator best known to the modern world, totally nailed it: “What we do in life echoes in eternity”. The amphitheater served as a venue for gladiator fights, animal hunts, executions and re-enactments of famous battles for nearly 5 centuries. The events were enormous: In 107 contests involved 11,000 animals and 10,000 gladiators during the 123 days. At least 50,000 spectators could fit into the arena to chant Life! in support to their favorite gladiators. And sometimes the crowd convinced the emperor to save their favorite’s life.

Regardless of earthquakes, stone-robbers, tourists and the amount of water flown under the bridge, the Colosseum still stands. And that is good news to all of us. Namely, already the ancient Romans knew the following:

“As long as the Colosseum stands, so shall Rome; when the Colosseum falls, Rome shall fall; when Rome falls, so falls the world.”

-Gart

Bonifacio – Corsica, France

June 23, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks!

France is the most visited country in the world ranked by the number of international tourist arrivals. That’s an impressive achievement considering that the Corsican nationalist movement has campaigned for the limiting of tourist infrastructure since the 1960’s. And by campaigning I mean harsh measures: bombings, assaults and robberies. Luckily Corsica is only one of the 27 régions of France, so there are plenty of opportunities even for the most sensitive tourist to enjoy the well distinguished French hospitality. I guess there is only one thing that the Corsican’s hate more than tourists and that is the French. Confusing enough, huh? I will try not to get into politics too much, but there’s one thing that should be mentioned: Corsica is the gem of the Mediterranean Sea and Corsicans would be nuts if they were not a little bit protective of it.

In addition to National Liberation Front of Corsica, Corsica Libera and other militant and/or peaceful groups that advocate the independence and isolation of Corsica, the costal line of the island for its part ensures that intruders will have difficulties to sneak in. Bonifacio, on the south coast of Corsica, is protected by 70 meters tall limestone cliffs that rise directly from the sea. The limestone has been undercut by the rough waters below so that the buildings are literally overhanging the cliffs. The restaurants in Bonifacio serve French cuisine to die for and that may also be the result if you book a table with a view.

-Gart

Bosa – Sardinia, Italy

May 31, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks!

Bosa is a picturesque town on the west coast of Sardinia. Bosa’s landmark Serravalle’s Castle is further up on the hill guarding the medieval town. Do not be fooled by the bright lights of Bosa; you will have difficulties to find any night time action around there. If you are into relaxing and getting to know yourself a bit better, this may just be the perfect place to spend your holiday. I think I have had enough of the rural countryside for now, it is time to seek new adventures. I read somewhere that France is the most popular country to visit. And France’s island Corsica is pretty close. I believe my next stop will be there; hopefully Corsica is something close to Ibiza, because my dancing feet are getting restless again! Stay tuned. Or better yet, let’s meet on Corsica.

– Gart

Nuraghe Santu Antine – Sardinia, Italy

May 26, 2015/0 Comments/in Places/by Gart the Gnome

Hi Folks!

This, my friends, is a nuraghe. Nuraghes were built by Nuragic people; I do not think the similarity in the name of the people and the construction is a coincidence. Nuragic people inhabited Sardinia some 3000 years ago up to the second century AD. There are over 7 thousand nuraghes in Sardinia. I have heard that nuraghes are not very popular these days, and I guess it is understandable. For instance in Costa Smeralda (a very posh area in Sardinia) some houses cost over 300.000 EUR per square meter (I know, sounds unbelievable but Costa Smeralda is the priciest place in Europe). Imagine owning a house over there and then your kids start begging: “daddy, mommy please buy us a trampoline”. Now you already paid a few millions for the house and the backyard, but just cannot fit a trampoline on your yard when there’s already a patio, possibly a pool and definitely a barbeque and then! An ancient nuraghe takes most of the space. In those moments you might begin to wonder how on earth could I get rid of the nuraghe or would it just be easier to buy a bigger lot. After all, the nuraghe has been sitting there for couple of thousand years before You.

Santu Antine is one of the largest nuraghes in Sardinia. It used to be some kind of a fortress. I guess there isn’t a clear consensus on the function of the nuraghes – we know quite little of the people who built them. I would be surprised if Nuragic had been that much different from you and me. And that’s why I am quite confident assuming that Nuragic lived in Nuraghes. I mean it would have kind of been non-intelligent to build a nuraghe and then sleep next to it in a hole in the ground.

– Gart